This is the Fundy Door's main menu, you SINNING FOOL.  While you're
trying to use your filthy heathen's brain to figure out which
capitalized, bracketed key to press, REPENT OR GO TO HELL.

"Fundy" is short for Fundamentalist Christian, and it is a label we are
proud to bear in the name of our LORD.

[B]iblical Proofs lets you view some concrete, incontrovertible proofs of
various Biblical subjects.

[T]alk to Fundy lets you talk to the exalted Fundy, who understands the
HOLY BIBLE completely and perfectly and can guide even your SINFUL
self to heaven.

[A]NSI activates and deactivates that Devil's Tool, ANSI graphics.  If
you turn on ANSI, you get pulldown menus.  If you turn off ANSI, you
get a tree-structured menu.  That's tree-structured as in the Tree of
Life from the HOLY BIBLE WORD OF GOD, SINNER.

[Q]uit is the COWARD's way out.  Do NOT choose this option until you
have REPENTed your heinous sins, you festering puke.

The [L]ibrary contains tomes that will touch and inspire you.
<10      >
This section lets you view some concrete proof of various Biblical
subjects:

General proof of everything to GOD's existence to True Christian Incest
can be found in this area:

[N]oah's Flood explains the evidence that the Biblical Great Global
Flood of Noah really really happened just as told by GOD.

[E]volution is scientifically debunked!

[H]ell is where you're headed, and here's why.

[P]reaching to touch your slimy, eternally damned soul.
<11      >
General proofs of things Christian can be found here; family values,
GOD's existence, Jesus CHRIST's divinity, to name a few.
<12      >
Noah's Flood really really happened.  Here we offer absolute proof.
<13      >
Evolution, that blasphemous lie, is here proven beyond the shadow of a
doubt to be invalid.
<14      >
This text offers explanations of why you're bound for HELL, YOU SINNER.
<15      >
Read the touching gems here and give your mind to JESUS to be cleansed.
<20      >
You can talk to the exalted Fundy, who understands the HOLY BIBLE
completely and perfectly and can guide even your SINFUL self to heaven.
I'll be happy to page him for you to communicate with directly.
<30      >
ANSI graphics can be activated to make your screen look less Puritan. We
find the concept repugnant, but anything to save your verminous soul...
<40      >
Quitting returns you to the GODless BBS you came from.  REPENT FIRST!
<50      >
The Library contains texts you should read time and time again, SINNER.

Here you can [L]ist the texts available and [R]ead a text.  Do so at
once, you cretinous heathen.
<51      >
List the texts available.  You'll be asked for a mask; just hit [Enter]
(GOD's favorite key) to see them all.  And you really need to see them
all, you SINNING HELLBOUND FOOL.
<52      >
Read a text.  Read it now.  Read it repeatedly.  Don't think about what
you read, just BELIEVE it.  REPENT.