             HELGUN THE HAIR FARMER
                   By Lucillus
          Dedicated to the hairy one
(Sung to the tune of "NY Mining Disaster 1941")

There's a story that I'd like you all to hear
It's about a man too dense to show his fear
Maybe it's all because of weight upon his head
He'll be growing longer hair until he's dead.
  All hail Helgun, the hair farmer bold 
When they made him they sure broke the mold
 Yes, I know, don't remind me, he's my son
Why do you think that I'll never have another one?

 There once stood a tree right in his way
 And others pushed upon it, then did say:
"It's no use, there's no way to push it down
 Let Helgun try, that silly hairy clown."
     But mighty was Helgun on that day
   No mere tree could ever block his way
 With a mighty crash he felled it to the earth
Helgun the mighty had shown us all his worth.

   But the reason I wonder if he's sane
  Is the night he leaped over the flames,
Twenty or thirty feet high they roared that night
 And I'll never forget that wondrous sight
With his hair streaming down along his back
  Helgun gathered himself for the attack
Where others feared to tread he leapt so high
None of the rest of us would dare to even try.

When at last he emerged deep from the flames
He rolled upon the ground and earned his name
And Hendrick dropped his beer to put him out
That he was burning up we never had a doubt
  But Hendrick had missed his mighty leap
    To find Helgun already on his feet
    All hail Helgun the firewalker bold
When they made him they sure broke the mold.

   All hail Helgun, the hair farmer bold
When they made him, they sure broke the mold
Yes, I know, don't remind me, he's my son,
Why do you think I'll never have another one?











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