(25) Tue 24 Jun 97 12:05 By: Judith Bandsma To: Ken Young Re: FREEDOM OF HOLYSMOKE St: ------------------------------------------------------------------------------ @EID:5388 22d860a0 @PID: BWMAX2 3.20 [Reg] @MSGID: 1:229/622.0 33aff018 @REPLY: 1:270/430@FidoNet 0000BCAB @TID: FastEcho 1.45a 10440 -=> Did I REALLY hear Ken Young say to Preston Simpson <=- KY> I did not get the messages about the acceptance of gay marriages by Fine...here we go again. Pacific Yearly Meeting Same-sex Marriage Minute On August 9, 1996, Pacific Yearly Meeting of the Religious Society of Friends made the statement that follows. This body represents Quakers from California, Hawaii, Nevada and Mexico. EQUALITY OF MARRIAGE RIGHTS As Quakers, some of the reasons we recognize marriages are to affirm the individuals in their choice, to support loving families, and to strengthen our spiritual community. It is also fundamental to Quaker faith and practice that we honor the equality and integrity of all human beings. Therefore, it is our belief that it is consistent with Quakers' historical faith and testimonies that we practice a single standard of treatment for all couples who wish to marry. Given that the State offers legal recognition of opposite-gender marriage and extends significant privileges to couples who legally marry, we believe that a commitment to equality requires that same-gender couples have the same rights and privileges. Therefore, we believe that the State should permit gay and lesbian couples to marry and share fully and equally in the rights and responsibilities of marriage. ... Backup not found: (A)bort (R)etry (S)lap nearest innocent bystander. --- Blue Wave/386 v2.30 * Origin: Aurora Exploratoria, Newcastle ON Canada (1:229/622) SEEN-BY: 10/3 12/12 24/888 102/2 943 105/72 106/2000 114/262 441 124/1 SEEN-BY: 130/1 1008 133/2 143/1 147/34 2021 167/166 170/400 202/1207 213/213 SEEN-BY: 218/2 42 801 890 900 901 907 1001 261/1108 270/101 275/429 280/1 SEEN-BY: 280/169 282/1 62 283/120 284/29 300/603 310/666 322/739 323/107 SEEN-BY: 324/278 343/600 346/250 352/3 356/18 371/42 377/86 382/92 387/5 SEEN-BY: 388/1 396/1 45 690/660 730/2 2401/0 2442/0 3603/420 3612/41 300 SEEN-BY: 3615/50 3619/25 3632/21 3651/9 3652/1 3667/1 3828/2 @PATH: 229/622 3615/50 396/1 218/907 801 890 ------------------------------------------------------------------------------ (26) Tue 24 Jun 97 12:05 By: Judith Bandsma To: Ken Young Re: minute2 St: ------------------------------------------------------------------------------ @EID:4e52 22d860a0 @PID: BWMAX2 3.20 [Reg] @MSGID: 1:229/622.0 33aff019 @REPLY: 1:270/430@FidoNet 0000BCAB @TID: FastEcho 1.45a 10440 Central Philadelphia (PA) MM Same-gender Marriage Minute A minute on marriage approved by Central Philadelphia Monthly Meeting 11 June, 1995. ---------------------------------------------------------------------- In his Journal in the year 1666, George Fox describes his view of marriage: I was moved to open the state of our marriages, declaring, How the people of God took one another in the assemblies of the elders; and that it was God who joined man and woman together before the fall. And though men had taken upon them to join in the fall, yet in the restoration it is God's joining that is the right and honourable marriage; but never any priest did marry any, that we read in the scriptures, from Genesis to the Revelations. Early Friends understood gender roles and the subjugation of women to be functions of the Fall from which Christ has freed us; we are to live in the realm of God, where relationships are based on mutuality. "There is no longer Jew nor Greek, slave nor free, male nor female, for you are all one in Christ" (Galatians 3:28). Marriage, to Friends, has always meant becoming helpsmeet to one another in living in God's realm. Early Quakers perceived marriage as a commitment to be entered into when called by God out of the single state into a partnership with another. Many Quaker journals record the experience of receiving such a specific call. Elizabeth Haddon, the young woman who came to New Jersey as an early proprietor, is supposed to have said to John Estaugh, a travelling Quaker minister, "I have a charge to love thee, John." After reflection, John decided that he had the same charge, and the two entered into a very happy and spiritually productive marriage. The Haddon marriage was childless. While not disapproving of sex, the early Friends did not consider procreation to be the primary purpose of marriage. When a Puritan challenged George Fox about his marriage to Margaret Fell, saying he thought marriage was only for the procreation of children, Fox told him that he had never thought of any such thing, but had married Margaret "only in obedience to the power of the Lord." To be sure that marriages followed a right leading, early Friends always consulted with elders. Sometimes one Friend would feel led to a marriage, and the partner would not be clear; in this case, the Friend must wait until clearness came. They used the Bible in their process of discernment, remembering Galatians 5:22-23: "The fruit of the Spirit is love, joy, peace, patience, kindness, goodness, faithfulness, gentleness, self-control. Against such there is no law." Believing that God alone made the marriage, the Children of the Light refused the services of either the church or state, and took each other in marriage in words much like those we use today. These marriages were illegal, since a justice of the peace was supposed to be present. Friends who wished to do so were allowed to post their marriages in the market square of the nearest town, thus at least notifying authorities of their new state. To do more than this was to marry not "in the light" and in 1653 Fox wrote an epistle urging Friends to avoid such marriages. The question of the legality of the marriages and the right of widows or children to inherit property was not settled until 1681, when a judge in Nottingham ruled that a child of a Quaker marriage could inherit, because he could not see that these marriages were not in accordance with the Bible. Building on these elements in our tradition our historic rejection of gender roles and our conviction that the primary function of marriage is not procreation but to support one another in living in obedience to God's will we of Central Philadelphia Monthly Meeting see no reason why helpsmeet must be of different sexes. With God nothing is impossible; hence it would be impious to rule out the possibility that the Spirit may indeed lead persons of the same gender into marriage. We affirm that the valid test of a marriage is not whether it is legal in the eyes of the state, but whether it is in obedience to the will of God, as manifested in the fruits of the Holy Spirit. --- Blue Wave/386 v2.30 * Origin: Aurora Exploratoria, Newcastle ON Canada (1:229/622) SEEN-BY: 10/3 12/12 24/888 102/2 943 105/72 106/2000 114/262 441 124/1 SEEN-BY: 130/1 1008 133/2 143/1 147/34 2021 167/166 170/400 202/1207 213/213 SEEN-BY: 218/2 42 801 890 900 901 907 1001 261/1108 270/101 275/429 280/1 SEEN-BY: 280/169 282/1 62 283/120 284/29 300/603 310/666 322/739 323/107 SEEN-BY: 324/278 343/600 346/250 352/3 356/18 371/42 377/86 382/92 387/5 SEEN-BY: 388/1 396/1 45 690/660 730/2 2401/0 2442/0 3603/420 3612/41 300 SEEN-BY: 3615/50 3619/25 3632/21 3651/9 3652/1 3667/1 3828/2 @PATH: 229/622 3615/50 396/1 218/907 801 890 ------------------------------------------------------------------------------ (27) Tue 24 Jun 97 12:05 By: Judith Bandsma To: Ken Young Re: minute3 St: ------------------------------------------------------------------------------ @EID:8e93 22d860a0 @SPLIT: 24 Jun 97 15:06:35 @229/622 3 01/02 +++++++++++ @MSGID: 1:229/622.0 33aff01a @PID: BWMAX2 3.20 [Reg] @REPLY: 1:270/430@FidoNet 0000BCAB @TID: FastEcho 1.45a 10440 MINUTES ON SAME-GENDER MARRIAGE AND MARRIAGES UNDER CARE OF MEETINGS IN NEW ENGLAND YEARLY MEETING --------------------------------------------------------------------------- Last updated 8 July 1996 Minutes HARTFORD (CT): March, 1986: The Meeting affirms the goodness of committed, loving relationships and offers recognition and support to those who share this ideal and desire to enter into a permanent relationship based upon it. By tradition, the Meeting recognizes committed union in a celebration of marriage under the care of the Meeting. The same loving care and consideration should be given to both same-sex and heterosexual applicants as outlined in Faith and Practice. SOUTH BERKSHIRE (MA): fall, 1986 endorsed Hartford's minute MT TOBY (MA): January, 1987 Endorsed Hartford's minute, suggesting that the word "should" in the final sentence be changed to "will." [NOTE: This change was made in the minute brought to Yearly Meeting in 1987 by Connecticut Valley Quarterly Meeting.] Excerpt of minutes: "As we come closer to a shared vision of a future that extends all the same rights to homosexual couples as are now enjoyed by heterosexual couples under the law, we must be prepared to take even what seem to be small steps to achieve this end. Our acceptance of the Hartford minute is our first step.... Our vision of marriage will not be complete until the unification of the legal and the spiritual is complete and available to all." MINUTE FORWARDED TO NEW ENGLAND YEARLY MEETING 1987 by Connecticut Valley Quarterly Meeting as approved at its session May 3rd, 1987 At the direction of the Quarter, Meetings in Connecticut Valley Quarterly Meeting have given attention to a minute on same-gender marriage approved by Hartford Meeting in March, 1986: The Meeting affirms the goodness of committed, loving relationships and offers recognition and support to those who share this ideal and desire to enter into a permanent relationship based upon it. By tradition, the Meeting recognizes committed union in a celebration of marriage under the care of the Meeting. The same loving care and consideration will be given to both same-sex and heterosexual applicants as outlined in Faith and Practice. While some Meetings in the Quarter have endorsed the Hartford minute, the Quarter as a whole is not in unity on any minute concerning spiritual unions under the care of the Meeting for those who cannot have a legal marriage. We are in unity, however, that this consideration has led us to deep questioning of some important spiritual matters, and we wish to share our process with the Yearly Meeting, encouraging any other Meetings who feel so led to join us in our continuing seeking. 1. We have a concern for relationships of any status, whether officially under the care of the Meeting or not. How do we nurture commitment among us? How is it possible to recognize the spiritual union of souls at all? 2. We have separated legal union from spiritual union in our discussions, aware of early Friends practice of marriage under the care of Meetings which had no legal status. What is the Meeting's appropriate role in legal matters relating to marriage and divorce? Do we need to reexamine this role? 3. The larger question raised among us in considering this minute was: "What does marriage under the care of the Meeting mean?" 4. We are aware that there is an unequal legal practice which allows benefits to heterosexuals (whether or not they choose to be legally married) which are denied to homosexuals. We are aware that disabled persons and older persons may lose their social security benefits if they legally marry. Among the questions raised by these realities are: * How does the law nurture committed relationships and of what concern is this to us? * How are we prepared to recognize and support what we discern as spiritual commitment when that commitment cannot be legally recognized? * What is the relationship of the Spirit and the law in questions of marriage? * In what ways are we as Meetings comfortable being "agents of the State?" At the direction of New England Yearly Meeting session August 16, 1987, this minute is to be placed with the draft chapter on human sexuality for Living With Oneself and Others being sent by Yearly Meeting Ministry and Counsel to monthly meetings this year for their response. PUTNEY (VT): March, 1988 We affirm our willingness as a Meeting to participate in celebrations of marriage, in accordance with our traditional procedures, for both opposite-sex and same-sex couples when one or both of the partners is a member of our Meeting. We intend to follow the same customary and careful process of arriving at clearness for all couples who wish to unite under our care. At every stage we intend to treat all couples with respect, care, and love. BEACON HILL (MA): April, 1988 We, the members and attenders of Beacon Hill Monthly Meeting, affirm our belief in that of God in every person. Furthermore, we attest that this belief embraces all persons regardless of sexual orientation. Beacon Hill affirms that all couples, including those of the same sex, have equal opportunity to be married within the framework of the meeting process. The love between these couples, as it grows, will enrich their relationship, the Meeting, and the world at large. The Meeting is committed to supporting these couples according to their needs. Beacon Hill acknowledges the Certificate of Marriage signed by the couple and those present at the ceremony as the witness of Friends to the couples' spiritual union. Mindful that only the heterosexual couples among us currently have the right to legally sanctioned marriage and its privileges, the Meeting asks Friends, and particularly couples preparing for marriage, to examine how best to respond and bear witness to the inequalities still present in the system. MIDDLEBURY (VT): June, 1989 We joyfully affirm our willingness as a Meeting to sanctify celebrations of marriage for both same and opposite gender couples. We intend to follow the good order of Friends in arriving at clearness for all couple who are led to unite under our loving care. NEW HAVEN (CT): July, 1989 endorsed Hartford minute (above) HANOVER (NH): November, 1989 Hanover Friends Meeting affirms our support of committed, loving relationships. We also affirm our willingness, as a Meeting, to celebrate marriages for all couples, whether same sex or opposite sex. We intend to follow the same customary and careful process of arriving at clearness for any couple who wishes to unite under our care in accordance with our traditional procedures. As always, we intend to consider all requests of marriage with respect, care, and love. CAMBRIDGE (MA): February, 1990 Friends Meeting of Cambridge affirms that relationships between persons of the same sex can be as committed and holy as the heterosexual relationships that Friends have called marriage can be. Friends intend to give the same loving care and consideration to both same-sex and heterosexual relationships. We therefore welcome the opportunity to celebrate God's love made manifest in the life of a couple at a meeting for worship appointed to celebrate their union, according to the good order of Friends, whether the couple is of the same or different sex. We are not yet clear whether same-sex unions should have a different name than heterosexual unions. We recognize that our explorations of the nature of marriage have raised certain issues with respect to our clearness process, and to the Meeting's oversight for all couples under its care, including the care of a partnership's dissolution. We direct the Meeting on Ministry and Counsel and the Marriage and Family Life Committee, together with concerned Friends, to explore these issues, and as needed, to bring recommendations for action to this Meeting. BURLINGTON (VT): May, 1990 We affirm our willingness as a Meeting to participate in celebrations of marriage for both opposite sex and same sex couples. We intend to follow the same customary and careful process of arriving at clearness for all couples who wish to unite under our care in accordance with our traditional procedures. At every stage we intend to treat all couples with respect, care, and love. PORTLAND (ME): December, 1991 A same-gender couple seeking to come under the care of the Meeting for marriage or a celebration of commitment will be considered in the same way a heterosexual couple is. YARMOUTH (MA) PREPARATIVE MEETING OF SANDWICH MONTHLY MEETING: May, 1992 On fifth month, 1992, Yarmouth Friends reaffirmed the minute giving the same care and concern to homosexual couples who wish to marry as we give to heterosexuals. The Meeting affirms the goodness of committed, loving relationships and offers recognition and support to those who share this ideal and desire to enter into a permanent relationship based upon it. By tradition, the Meeting recognizes committed union in a celebration of marriage under the care of the Meeting. The same loving care and consideration should be given to both same-sex and heterosexual applicants. We are led to this position not to coerce individuals into participating in the particular institution of marriage. Rather, we have come to this from our belief that all discrimination is contrary to the working of the divine and/or spirit within each of us. We affirm our belief that homosexuals are entitled to the same rights and privileges as heterosexuals. While we recognize that we cannot control the laws of the State, we can ensure that our spiritual practice does not reinforce the oppression. Realizing that approval of this concern is today unlikely, at this time we ask the other meetings of Sandwich Monthly Meeting to discuss and educate yourselves regarding this matter so that in the future we can achieve a sense of unity in our Monthly Meeting. Further, we recommend that Friends consider the section on marriage in Faith and Practice, particularly the introduction on page 153, as well as the following quote: "Oppression in the extreme appears terrible: but oppression in more refined appearances remains to be oppression; and where the smallest degree of it is cherished it grows stronger and more extensive. To labour for a perfect redemption from this spirit of oppression is the great business of the whole family of Christ Jesus in this world." John Woolman (1763-1764) MINUTE FROM SALEM QUARTER TO NEW ENGLAND YEARLY MEETING, AUGUST, 1992 Some meetings within Salem Quarterly Meeting have labored with the question of same gender marriage or celebrations of commitment and the pastoral care of the partners in these unions. We believe this is an important question that should be considered by other Friends' meetings in New England Yearly Meeting. Salem Quarterly Meeting is not yet unified on the subject of same gender marriage, but encourages meetings to consider a search for unity on this issue. We forward this letter and history from Beacon Hill Monthly Meeting in the hope that it will be useful in further discernment. [Note: history not included here] LETTER FROM BEACON HILL MONTHLY MEETING We are writing to you in an effort to open a dialogue around the issue of same gender marriage. Our meeting began considering this issue about five years ago, and reached unity in support of same gender marriage after much corporate and individual searching. This process of discernment tremendously enriched our meeting by expanding our vision of community and equality. Subsequently, this unity enabled us to take under our care a marriage between two women. These experiences led us to the hope that Friends' testimony on equality would extend to the marriage of same gender couples throughout New England Yearly Meeting. Now that we have taken this marriage under our care, we are concerned that should this couple move to another meeting within New England, they would be received and cared for as would any other married couple. We have reached unity on the following minute, which we offer to your meeting for your consideration. We acknowledge that same gender marriages and celebrations of commitment are taking place in the larger Quaker community. Should one of these couples move to our meeting, we will support their relationship as we would that of any other married couple. We bring our witness on same gender marriage to the wider Quaker community because we greatly desire that Friend unite with us in the support of these relationships. We would welcome the opportunity to provide you with more information, or visit with your meeting, should you so desire. Polly Kmetz, Clerk Yearly Meeting approved having these minutes sent to monthly meetings for their consideration and also referred them to Yearly Meeting Ministry and Counsel for its consideration. STORRS (CT): October 18, 1992 Minute 83. Ministry and Counsel presented a minute on same-gender relationships for consideration by the Meeting. The Meeting agreed at the outset of the discussion that it supported the basic thrust of the minute. The final version approved by the Meeting is: Background: During the winter and spring of 1991-92, Ministry and Counsel initiated and supported a committee to organize discussions on the Meeting's spiritual relationship to gay men, lesbians, and bi-sexuals. Five informational or worship sharing sessions attended by 25 to more than 30 were held at the rise of Meeting. These offered the Meeting community a rich opportunity to explore the issues and problems faced by individuals living in a homophobic society. As a result of this exploratory process we have come to understand that our concern should be for the quality of the relationship rather than for the sexual orientation of the partners. The Meeting commits itself to promoting acceptance, dignity and respect for people of same-sex orientation. Any loving relationship that honors the sacredness of each partner's life and spirit should be embraced by the Meeting. We affirm that we should support all individuals in such relationships including, but not limited to, an offering of the benefits of a public celebration of mutual commitment. It is the privilege of the couple to call their union by any name they choose. The process for --- Blue Wave/386 v2.30 * Origin: Aurora Exploratoria, Newcastle ON Canada (1:229/622) SEEN-BY: 10/3 12/12 24/888 102/2 943 105/72 106/2000 114/262 441 124/1 SEEN-BY: 130/1 1008 133/2 143/1 147/34 2021 167/166 170/400 202/1207 213/213 SEEN-BY: 218/2 42 801 890 900 901 907 1001 261/1108 270/101 275/429 280/1 SEEN-BY: 280/169 282/1 62 283/120 284/29 300/603 310/666 322/739 323/107 SEEN-BY: 324/278 343/600 346/250 352/3 356/18 371/42 377/86 382/92 387/5 SEEN-BY: 388/1 396/1 45 690/660 730/2 2401/0 2442/0 3603/420 3612/41 300 SEEN-BY: 3615/50 3619/25 3632/21 3651/9 3652/1 3667/1 3828/2 @PATH: 229/622 3615/50 396/1 218/907 801 890 ------------------------------------------------------------------------------ (28) Tue 24 Jun 97 12:05 By: Judith Bandsma To: Ken Young Re: 2 minute3 St: ------------------------------------------------------------------------------ @EID:e0a1 22d860a0 @SPLIT: 24 Jun 97 15:06:35 @229/622 3 02/02 +++++++++++ @PID: BWMAX2 3.20 [Reg] @REPLY: 1:270/430@FidoNet 0000BCAB @TID: FastEcho 1.45a 10440 publicly recognizing this union shall follow the customary procedures as outlined in Faith and Practice. AMESBURY (MA): November, 1992 All loving relationships are sacred and should be accepted and honored by the Meeting. All couples are entitled to the ceremony of marriage following Friends' practices. The Meeting supports those marriages under its care. BELFAST (ME): February 7, 1993 Minute on Same Sex Marriage and Commitment Mindful that the spiritual growth of each member of a couple sometimes may best proceed, and the love between them may best ripen and mature, in the context of a marriage which takes place in a community of faith and with the support and tender regard of that community; mindful that Friends who prefer to establish lasting bonds with someone of the same gender are excluded from marriage by law and by custom; and mindful that such exclusion does violence to the spirit of those Friends, we are clear that applications by couples, whether of the same or opposite gender, to be married under the care of this meeting, shall all be given the same tender, careful consideration. Whether the couple calls their relationship a marriage or a commitment, we honor the covenant. Further, we look forward to the day when all couple who so wish can enjoy the full recognition and entitlements of marriage from the society at large. COBSCOOK (ME): July 18, 1993 Minute 93:43 The meeting addressed the issue of same gender marriages as New England Yearly Meeting requested we do. The meeting would apply the same guidelines and standards to such marriage as we would to a heterosexual marriage as outlined in New England Yearly Meeting Faith and Practice. We recognize that there are additional concerns (legal, economic, and social) involved in same gender marriages, but we have faith that the clearness committee overseeing such a marriage would thoughtfully address those both for the individuals involved and the meeting as a whole. This minute is the result of our beginning attempts to address this issue and we suspect it will evolve as we further pursue the matter. NORTH SHORE (MA): July 23, 1993 Minute On Same Gender Unions We at North Shore Meeting recognize that the Divine Light shines with equal brightness in all loving and committed relationships, whether straight or gay. We believe that we are called and ready to support, recognize and celebrate all such relationships, holding them in the Light and participating in the public celebration of such commitment. We believe that marriage is fundamentally a spiritual union, brought about by the Inner Light in the hearts, minds, and lives of two people. A wedding or celebration of commitment is a public statement and recognition of such a spiritual union in which, in the presence of God and before assembled Friends, each promises, with divine assistance, to be loving and faithful unto the other for as long as they both shall live. Therefore, we affirm that if a couple comes before us requesting such a ceremony, we will appoint a clearness committee for them, provided that at least one person in that couple be a member or regular attender at our meeting. If the couple is found to be clear for union, we will hold a celebration of loving commitment under our care, in accordance with traditional procedures. We are aware of the diversity of attitudes towards the term "marriage" and leave to the couple the characterization of their relationship. We note that one Friend was unable to accept the use of the term "marriage" for same-gender unions. FARMINGTON (ME): October 8, 1993 Farmington Friends Meeting honors commitments to be loving and faithful partners made in the presence of God. We honor such commitment in both heterosexual and homosexual relationships. Our Meeting endeavors to support such commitments between loving partners with respect and with sensitivity. SMITHFIELD (RI): October 24, 1993 Minute 93.78 Salem Quarter Minute [see above, p.4]: The Committee on Ministry and Counsel received a request from Beacon Hill Monthly Meeting and Salem Quarter to examine how we would respond to same-gender couple married under the care of another meeting who might move from that meeting to ours. Ministry and Counsel brought this concern before Smithfield Friends at an open meeting on March 21, 1993. There were many tender feelings expressed at this meeting. The sense was that on of our strengths at Smithfield Meeting is our willingness to welcome people from a variety of backgrounds and personal histories. We wish to provide all a place to seek God's will in their lives and to find a community which seeks God together in love. Out of the sense of this gathering, Ministry and Counsel has brought forth our own version of the Beacon Hill minutes, and we unite in supporting the following statement: We acknowledge that same gender marriages and celebrations of commitment are taking place in the larger Quaker community. Should one of these couples move to our meeting, we will support their relationship as we would that of any other couple. It is our hope that as a community and as individuals we might continue to grow in our understanding of the meaning of marriage and committed relationships. FRESH POND (MA) : January 9, 1994 A couple marries in response to their love for each other and the guidance of the Holy Spirit. True marriage represents the spiritual union of two hearts and is not dependent upon outward forms or legal recognition. The meeting cares for and celebrates the marriage relationship but it is God who sanctifies the marriage. We believe that the Divine Light illuminates all loving and committed relationships. We therefore affirm that we will take under our care the marriage of gay and lesbian couples in the same manner that we do for heterosexual couples. We further undertake to support and nurture all families within our meeting whatever form they may take. We realize that this support will entail educating ourselves about the diverse needs of the families that comprise our community. We recognize that the unity we have found on this issue is not shared by Friends everywhere. We cherish God's spirit in others even if they are not in unity with us on this matter. We hope that Friends' continued search for guidance on this issue will not be a source of division but will lead to a deeper unity and love among all of us. NORTHAMPTON (MA): February 13, 1994 Northampton Meeting affirms the goodness of committed, loving relationships and offers recognition and support to those who share this ideal and desire to enter into a permanent relationship based upon it. By tradition, the Meeting recognizes committed union in a celebration of marriage under the care of the Meeting. The same loving care and consideration will be given to both same-sex and heterosexual couples as outlined in Faith and Practice. The Meeting shares a vision of a future that extends all the same blessings and legal rights to homosexual couples as are now enjoyed by heterosexual couples. The Meeting's vision of marriage will not be complete until the unification of the legal and the spiritual is complete and available to all. MONADNOCK (NH), October, 1995: Monadnock Monthly Meeting will set up a clearness committee for marriage for any couple which requests it, as long as at least one of the couple is a member or regular attender of this meeting. We will not discriminate on the basis of age, race, or sexual orientation. DOVER (NH), January, 1996: Dover Friends Meeting commits itself to promoting acceptance and respect for the dignity of all loving couples (heterosexual and homosexual) whose relationship honors the sacredness of each partner's life and spirit as important to the life of the Meeting. We wish to support all individuals in such relationships and stand ready to take such relationships within our Meeting under our care. Upon receiving an application, Dover Friends Meeting will provide a clearness process. If the couple is found clear, and if Meeting approves, members of the meeting will be invited to witness prayerfully to the couple's speaking their vows to each other in a designated meeting for worship, provide oversight for putting that relationship into as secure a legal foundation as possible, and seek to provide encouragement and guidance throughout the life of this couple. In the case of a heterosexual couple, the legal foundation is provided through the state by the marriage license. In the case of a gay or lesbian couple, or a heterosexual couple not desiring a state license, Dover Friends Meeting will appoint an oversight committee to work with the couple to put into place the legal documents regarding the care of children, sharing and stewardship of material resources, separation agreement and wills, that approximate as much as possible the legal responsibilities and privileges of a heterosexual marriage. The naming of the celebration will be left up to the couple with the help of the clearness committee appointed by the meeting. A couple may choose to call it a celebration of commitment, a celebration of union, or a celebration of marriage, keeping in mind that some members may not be comfortable with using the term "marriage" in this way. We recognize that within our own meeting and within the larger Religious Society of Friends there are differences, even after many years of sincere search and prayer, in how each of us perceives the Truth. We have wrestled long and hard on this issue, holding fast to patience, good will, and a love for each other. We give thanks for the care and guidance of the Holy Spirit, for it is the Presence of Divine Love which transcends our differences to hold us in a deeper unity. FRAMINGHAM (MA) February, 1996: Framingham Monthly Meeting affirms our belief in that of God in every person. Furthermore, we attest that this belief embraces all persons regardless of sexual orientation. Framingham affirms that all couples, including those of the same gender, have equal opportunity to be married in the manner of Friends, under the care of the Meeting. The love between these couples, as it grows, will enrich their relationship, the Meeting and the World at large. The Meeting is committed to supporting these couples according to their need. Framingham Meeting acknowledges the Certificate of Marriage signed by the couple and those present at the ceremony as the witness of Friends to the couple's spiritual union. Mindful that only mixed gender couples among us currently have the rights to legally sanctioned marriage and its privileges, the Meetings asks Friends and particularly couples preparing for marriage, to examine how best to respond and bear witness to the inequalities still present in the legal system. MIDCOAST (ME), April, 1996: Midcoast Meeting of the Religious Society of Friends rejoices in the love between two people as one of the greatest gifts of God. The religious life of the Meeting offers continuing tender support to all couples in our Quaker community who wish to express their love and commitment to one another in a permanent relationship. The same loving care and consideration will be given both to same-gender and heterosexual couples who request marriage under the care of the Meeting. The process for approval will follow the good order of Friends as described in Faith and Practice. Marriages Under Care Marriages or ceremonies of commitment of same-gender couples have occurred under the care of three Meetings: Putney (two men), Beacon Hill (two couples, each of two women), and Mt Toby (three couples, each of two women), Cambridge (two women). A ceremony of commitment between two women has been approved by Vassalboro (ME) Meeting (which has no specific general minute on same-gender unions). ... Backup not found: (A)bort (R)etry (S)lap nearest innocent bystander. --- Blue Wave/386 v2.30 * Origin: Aurora Exploratoria, Newcastle ON Canada (1:229/622) SEEN-BY: 10/3 12/12 24/888 102/2 943 105/72 106/2000 114/262 441 124/1 SEEN-BY: 130/1 1008 133/2 143/1 147/34 2021 167/166 170/400 202/1207 213/213 SEEN-BY: 218/2 42 801 890 900 901 907 1001 261/1108 270/101 275/429 280/1 SEEN-BY: 280/169 282/1 62 283/120 284/29 300/603 310/666 322/739 323/107 SEEN-BY: 324/278 343/600 346/250 352/3 356/18 371/42 377/86 382/92 387/5 SEEN-BY: 388/1 396/1 45 690/660 730/2 2401/0 2442/0 3603/420 3612/41 300 SEEN-BY: 3615/50 3619/25 3632/21 3651/9 3652/1 3667/1 3828/2 @PATH: 229/622 3615/50 396/1 218/907 801 890 ------------------------------------------------------------------------------ (29) Tue 24 Jun 97 12:05 By: Judith Bandsma To: Ken Young Re: Mormons are Christians, K St: ------------------------------------------------------------------------------ @EID:0beb 22d860a0 @PID: BWMAX2 3.20 [Reg] @MSGID: 1:229/622.0 33aff015 @REPLY: 1:270/430@FidoNet 0000BCAC @TID: FastEcho 1.45a 10440 -=> Did I REALLY hear Ken Young say to Judith Bandsma <=- KY> I might ask you the very same question.. Hitt has already told us KY> about the three kinds of Quakers, just as I claimed there were. Yes, and what you claimed...what JJ found...is what any NON-Quaker would find and accept for fact. Those who belong to the RSOF tend to delve a bit deeper into our own history in order to understand each other better. As I said to Dan Ceppa...count the membership. That's how many KINDS of Quakers there are. As for conferences, there are about 5, maybe more. Your 'friend' would know this if he was a Quaker. FGC and FUM are no longer separate entities. They recombined in 1955. But you are ignoring the Beanites, Wilburites, Woolites (yes, folks, there really are Woolite Quakers), Independents, and the conference made up of members of all of these overseen by the AFSC. Your 'claim' don't hold water, little boy. ... Backup not found: (A)bort (R)etry (S)lap nearest innocent bystander. --- Blue Wave/386 v2.30 * Origin: Aurora Exploratoria, Newcastle ON Canada (1:229/622) SEEN-BY: 10/3 12/12 24/888 102/2 943 105/72 106/2000 114/262 441 124/1 SEEN-BY: 130/1 1008 133/2 143/1 147/34 2021 167/166 170/400 202/1207 213/213 SEEN-BY: 218/2 42 801 890 900 901 907 1001 261/1108 270/101 275/429 280/1 SEEN-BY: 280/169 282/1 62 283/120 284/29 300/603 310/666 322/739 323/107 SEEN-BY: 324/278 343/600 346/250 352/3 356/18 371/42 377/86 382/92 387/5 SEEN-BY: 388/1 396/1 45 690/660 730/2 2401/0 2442/0 3603/420 3612/41 300 SEEN-BY: 3615/50 3619/25 3632/21 3651/9 3652/1 3667/1 3828/2 @PATH: 229/622 3615/50 396/1 218/907 801 890 ------------------------------------------------------------------------------ (34) Tue 24 Jun 97 12:05 By: Judith Bandsma To: Ken Young Re: yet another minute St: ------------------------------------------------------------------------------ @EID:7263 22d860a0 @PID: BWMAX2 3.20 [Reg] @MSGID: 1:229/622.0 33aff01b @REPLY: 1:270/430@FidoNet 0000BCAB @TID: FastEcho 1.45a 10440 The following minute was contributed by Friend Dorothy Day. from Minutes of Illinois Yearly Meeting 100th Annual Sessions from July 31st to August 4th, 1974, inclusive Illinois Yearly Meeting is aware that there is great diversity in the relationships that people develop with one another. The worth of these relationships must not be judged on the basis of conventionality but rather to the degree that the relationship contributes to the growth of love in those affected. Homosexual and bisexual people in this society are subject to serious discrimination in many areas: in employment, housing, medical care, family life education, parental rights, and the right to worship. We believe sexual acts in private between consenting adults should be removed from all criminal sanctions. Civil rights should be extended to protect homosexual and bisexual people just as they now protect other groups which suffer discrimination. We urge Friends and Friendly organizations to work for appropriate legislation. Friends encourage everywhere the development of love and trust in human relationships. In this light, we urge Friends to explore and examine their knowledge and assumptions about sexuality, with special reference to homosexuality, with a view to achieving awareness of the possibility and potentials for growth, love, and trust in these and other intimate relationships. [The minute] was approved, with expressions from Friends that discussion on the topic should continue. ... Backup not found: (A)bort (R)etry (S)lap nearest innocent bystander. --- Blue Wave/386 v2.30 * Origin: Aurora Exploratoria, Newcastle ON Canada (1:229/622) SEEN-BY: 10/3 12/12 24/888 102/2 943 105/72 106/2000 114/262 441 124/1 SEEN-BY: 130/1 1008 133/2 143/1 147/34 2021 167/166 170/400 202/1207 213/213 SEEN-BY: 218/2 42 801 890 900 901 907 1001 261/1108 270/101 275/429 280/1 SEEN-BY: 280/169 282/1 62 283/120 284/29 300/603 310/666 322/739 323/107 SEEN-BY: 324/278 343/600 346/250 352/3 356/18 371/42 377/86 382/92 387/5 SEEN-BY: 388/1 396/1 45 690/660 730/2 2401/0 2442/0 3603/420 3612/41 300 SEEN-BY: 3615/50 3619/25 3632/21 3651/9 3652/1 3667/1 3828/2 @PATH: 229/622 3615/50 396/1 218/907 801 890