In the church's teachings, temple marriage seals the man to God and the woman to the man. We were taught that the only way for a woman to achieve celestial glory was through a man. My value as a woman was first and foremost defined by my obedience to my husband. I knew that I could never be married again in the eyes of the Mormon God, in the temple, without getting a Temple Annulment. However, my husband would and did, as he later was remarried in the temple, without having our temple marriage annulled.
See the Mormons gave up early polygamy in the 1800's to gain statehood, but, they still practice "celestial polygamy." I was told, from childhood, that this was because there were so many more "good" women than men in this life, and "celestial polygamy" was the only way that God could ensure that all "good" women were allowed full participation in celestial life through the priesthood. HOGWASH!
I knew finally, that any church that made me a second class citizen not only in this life, but the next, could not be sanctioned by a sentient being smart enough to have created the cosmos and create the beauty I found in my son.
I immediately began to identify myself to anyone who asked as a "Former Mormon," not a jack Mormon, or an inactive Mormon.
This act of self-preservation in the face of my most difficult challenge in my 23 years of life is one I feel very proud of.
I no longer refer to a "God". Rather, I refer to the entity(ies) who seem to assist my life as "The Universe." I have had spiritual events in my life since I left. I do not seek others to define them for me. I am grateful for whatever attention The Universe turns in my direction.
NOTE: I fully authorize publication of my story. I believe there are many others out there seeking support to make their own difficult choices. Please e-mail me at landra@fishnet.net., I look forward to hearing from one and all!
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